"goddam, what a bummer." --- Dr. Gonzo
Tuesday, November 14
always rough
the first birthday after. it's rough, i can't tell ya. he would've been 23 today. i don't even remember me at 23. i can't go visit cause i have a midterm, but i'm sure he understands.
"goddam, what a bummer." --- Dr. Gonzo
"goddam, what a bummer." --- Dr. Gonzo
Thursday, November 2
strange dream (i want to figure out/remember)
these are parts of a dream that kept going last night, most likely not in order. i think i woke up once or twice among them.
- i was trying to get in touch with Riley. i either had to tell him something, or needed information from him. at one part, i was at the house i grew up in, in the bathroom, and saw his face emerge from the closed door. i figured out that i could only see him in that bathroom, and only sometimes. i don't remember what we talked about.
- sometimes the person who had passed that i wanted to talk to was Daren instead of Riley. it got all muddled like dreams do. in the dream i told my mom something to the effect of "i told Daren i thought he was going to die" (don't like that part - gives me chills)
- i kept trying to get ahold of Mike on my mobile, because he had the phone number/some kind of connection to someone that could help me. that someone was a country singer who wore black. one his names began with r (i keep thinking Rascal Flatts or Ray Wiley Hubbard but those don't seem like it. Ray Flatts or Ray Hubbard maybe?)
- there was someone else that i thought could help me too, a girl who looked kind of like one of Jessica's friends in Memphis (Shalice I think). the girl had dark straight hair, freckles, and bright green eyes. she was always with her younger brother. i think he father was famous, possibly a sports broadcaster, because she & her brother seemed to be in a broadcast booth. it was hard to get her attention, because whenever i tried to talk to her, there would be cheers from outside the booth, and she would get distracted.
- the dream went between the house where i grew up and some kind of arena, like the savvis center or whatever it's called now.
the last time i woke up, i felt very disoriented, like the world had changed somehow. that's all i can remember now.
i'll probably add to it as i things come to me. all of this came to me when i looked at Riley's photo on my desk. if anyone has any expertise in the area of dream interpretation, be sure to drop a comment. i tend to think that dream interpretation depends on the dreamer, but i could use some ideas.
- i was trying to get in touch with Riley. i either had to tell him something, or needed information from him. at one part, i was at the house i grew up in, in the bathroom, and saw his face emerge from the closed door. i figured out that i could only see him in that bathroom, and only sometimes. i don't remember what we talked about.
- sometimes the person who had passed that i wanted to talk to was Daren instead of Riley. it got all muddled like dreams do. in the dream i told my mom something to the effect of "i told Daren i thought he was going to die" (don't like that part - gives me chills)
- i kept trying to get ahold of Mike on my mobile, because he had the phone number/some kind of connection to someone that could help me. that someone was a country singer who wore black. one his names began with r (i keep thinking Rascal Flatts or Ray Wiley Hubbard but those don't seem like it. Ray Flatts or Ray Hubbard maybe?)
- there was someone else that i thought could help me too, a girl who looked kind of like one of Jessica's friends in Memphis (Shalice I think). the girl had dark straight hair, freckles, and bright green eyes. she was always with her younger brother. i think he father was famous, possibly a sports broadcaster, because she & her brother seemed to be in a broadcast booth. it was hard to get her attention, because whenever i tried to talk to her, there would be cheers from outside the booth, and she would get distracted.
- the dream went between the house where i grew up and some kind of arena, like the savvis center or whatever it's called now.
the last time i woke up, i felt very disoriented, like the world had changed somehow. that's all i can remember now.
i'll probably add to it as i things come to me. all of this came to me when i looked at Riley's photo on my desk. if anyone has any expertise in the area of dream interpretation, be sure to drop a comment. i tend to think that dream interpretation depends on the dreamer, but i could use some ideas.
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